In this Spring Cleaning Your Life in a Week Series, I wanted to explore the thought of spring cleaning your mind. Specifically, in the area of cleaning out the fear and often paralyzing self-doubt. And replacing it with confidence and a fresh boldness to pursue your dreams, goals, and passions.
As moms, we have so much to manage, plan, juggle, balance, and let’s not forget clean! But we have goals we want to reach – like losing that stubborn baby weight… or toddler weight in my case!
We have passions we want to pursue outside of our jobs and our home life. Maybe you want to start a blog like this one or start an outline store to sell your handmade creations.
There’s just one problem… one obstacle standing in our way.
Fear and its cousin who runs close behind – self-doubt.
So how do we find that confidence and fresh boldness? Keep reading!
Why Your Goals Aren’t Working and What You Need to Do
“Blindly making a goal of meeting XYZ without knowing the full set of consequences may be setting you up for indirect failure. And that indirect failure may be more harmful to your happiness and those around you than you were ever aware of.
So my thoughts are, goals are only good when the outcome is win-win. If goals come at the cost of your family’s quality of life, it’s a short-term win and a long-term loss.”
Being a Stay at Home Mom While Pursuing your Dreams
“I cannot even begin to tell you the amount of joy I get from raising these two little girls. I love being able to stay home with them, love on them, clean up after and with them, take care of them.
I genuinely do love fostering their gifts and holding their hands through the trying times. What I’ve realized is that along with being a mom, I have other dreams and passions I didn’t even know existed.
Figuring out how to merge all of these things together has been difficult, but one thing rings true: I am a better mom when I do something for myself. And it is not selfish, by any means.”
How to Overcome Self Doubt for Good
“It is so easy to get caught up in the vicious cycle of self-doubt and negative self-talk. I use to (and still do at times) have this irrational fear of failure. I was so scared of failing that I held myself back from trying anything new. If I did actually try something new, I wouldn’t dare tell anyone that I was, because I was scared if I did fail, they would judge me, and that left me with no support system or accountability, which often led me to failure. (vicious cycle, I know).
BUT, eventually I become so accustomed to not trying new things that it became normal for me, and then I became bored and uninspired by anything, and with that I was using the “There is no point in trying I will just give up or fail” as an excuse to stay inside my comfort zone .
Luckily, I broke out of that rut and realized that I enjoy personal growth and personal improvement and that in order to achieve either of those things, I had to leave my very cozy comfort zone, I needed to take a few risks, and I needed to stop being terrified of failure. But most importantly, I needed to stop using my fear of failing as an excuse. So I did.”
Forget Overcoming Your Fear, You Need to Understand Your Fear
“You have goals and dreams you want to achieve, but you’re stuck at “I’m afraid.” Like the opening montage to an amazing movie, it starts playing and before the movie picks up, you hit the escape button.
So instead of thinking about all the good possibilities that could happen, we freeze, hit escape, and stay where it’s safe in our comfort zones.
Nothing bad happens in the comfort zone, but nothing great happens either. You’re still “safe and sound” in a situation you’re not loving. And every time you submit your thoughts and your actions to the fear, you’re actually reinforcing it.
We may not be able to control what happens to us or change the system, BUT we can control our thoughts. In this space, you are in control.”
If You’re Not Sure of Your Purpose, Follow Your Passion
“When I found my sweet spot–that place where our passion, what we’re good at (our skill) and God’s timing collide, it was divine. I love how my dear friend, Ann Voskamp puts it, “You were made for the place where your real passion meets compassion because there lies your real purpose.”
Saying yes to our purpose is more about courage and faith than opportunity and success. I don’t think we always recognize our God-sized dream for what it is, especially when it’s wrapped up in our normalcy.”
How Motherhood Prepares You to Run a Business
“So much of my time was focused on this sweet child I was raising, but I couldn’t completely let myself go. In those free moments, I was consumed with how to improve myself, as a wife, mother, contributor to society etc.
I began using my time to learn valuable skills. When my baby was little I would read articles during late night feedings or work on a course that taught a practical skill.
This helped me stay fulfilled and confident. Although I knew nothing was more important than that little cutie, it did give me some much needed “me time.”
28 Books to Read in 2018
This post is full is great books to read this year in every area:
Your personal enjoyment AKA Fiction
How to Boost Your Confidence and Overcome Self Doubt
“To overcome self-doubt requires affirmative action while being attentive to the inner critic — that is, you take action in spite of the doubt.
In a recent documentary highlighting the sport of accelerated free falling, the adventurer is asked by a reporter if he felt fear before jumping. He reassured him fear was present during every jump and reminded him of the inherent dangers associated with the sport. He managed his fear by turning down the volume on it so it didn’t overwhelm him.”
What’s your biggest struggle holding you back from pursuing your dreams, goals, and passions? Share in the comments below!