No matter how naturally talkative your child is, it seems the older they get the less they share… with their parents, that is. It used to be that every day was an adventure they couldn’t wait to tell you all about when they got jumped in the car after school.
But now, you’re met with the all-encompassing “good” when asked how their day was. The problem isn’t with your child and their ability to pour their heart out to you or their lack of desire to share. It’s all about the questions being asked.
Asking the right questions is one of the most powerful present parenting tools we have as moms. In fact, if we spent more time asking questions instead of lecturing and telling our kids how they need to think and behave we’d learn so much about our kids.
Here are 7 tips to help you ask questions in the most effective way.
Why Questions are So Important
Kids, and especially teenagers, require you to find the combination of words asked in just the right way to get them to open up and share their heart. It’s sometimes like completing a riddle at the end of a level in a video game.
I’m not sure why this is the case, but it seems to be so for most parents. And if it isn’t, you’ve probably already cracked the code!
Here are some fun questions you can ask your child at different times of the day. For example, after school, after they attend a party or sleepover or a play date, after church service, and just plain fun questions to ask anytime to get the conversation flowing and get to know your child’s heart!
You’d be surprised how many things can happen in a day and our children don’t always know how to communicate their fears, their victories, and their questions. That’s why these questions are super helpful!
I’ve categorized them in sections so you can easily refer to them again and again!
You’ll be surprised how easily these questions will get the conversation going and how quickly you’ll get to know your growing child. Have fun!
Questions to Ask Your Kids After School
1. What was the funniest part of your day?
2. What was something you did today that made you feel brave?
3. What was something that happened today that made you feel scared or alone?
4. How did you help someone today?
5. Tell me one thing that made you feel smart?
6. What new fact did you learn today?
7. What challenged you at school today?
8. If you could be the teacher tomorrow, how would you do things?
9. Does anyone in your class have a hard time following the rules?
10. How does that make you feel?
11. Who do you want to make friends with that you haven’t already?
12. What subject is the hardest for you?
13. What subject is the easiest for you?
14. If you could stop doing anything in your school day, what would it be?
15. If you could add anything to your school day, what would it be?
16. Are there times in your when you feel left out?
17. Do you ever feel like someone at school is a bully to you or anyone else?
18. What is the most popular thing to do at recess?
19. How would you rate your day on a scale of 1 to 10? Why?
20. If anyone in the world could be your teacher for a day who would it be?
Questions to Ask Your Kids After a Play Date
21. What was the most fun thing you did at the party/sleepover/play date?
22. What was something you did that was helpful?
23. What did you eat for lunch/lunch/snack?
24. If there were ever a zombie apocalypse, which one of your friends would survive?
25. What was the funniest thing that happened?
26. Was there ever a time when you felt afraid or alone?
27. Did anyone upset you? How?
28. If you could have your own party, who would you invite?
29. Were they kids at the party who you aren’t friends with?
30. Did you meet a new friend?
Questions to Ask Your Kids After Church Service
31. What was the silliest thing that happened at church?
32. Was there anyone who came to service for the first time?
33. How did you make that person feel welcome?
34. What was something you learned for the first time?
35. Do you remember the memory verse, and what does it mean to you?
36. Did you make a new friend today? What was their name?
37. If you could teach your service next Sunday, how would you do it?
38. What will you do differently after today?
39. What’s one thing I can help you remember or talk more about this week?
40. What’s one thing that made sense to you today about God/bible/church?
Fun Questions to Ask Your Kids Anytime
41. If you could create a new planet what would you name it, and what would it be like?
42. If you could change your name, what would you name yourself? Why?
43. If you were given a million dollars and had to spend it all in one week, what would you buy?
44. What’s your favorite thing to daydream about?
45. What’s your biggest dream that you wish would come true?
46. What have your friends been up to lately?
47. How do you show people you care about them?
48. What does it mean to show love?
49. What is one place you want to travel to one day?
50. If you could change anything about your family what would it be?
51. If you could change anything about your life what would it be?
52. If you could change any of rules of this world which ones would you change?
53. Where would you want to go on vacation if we could leave right now?
54. If you could create a new Crayola color, what would if look like and what would you name it?
55. What’s the best book you’ve ever read?
56. If you had your own motto, what would it be?
57. If you could have dinner with anyone who would it be?
58. If you could go on vacation anywhere, where would you go?
59. If you could live on your own private island but could only take 5 things, what would they be?
60. Describe the house you want to live in when you’re a grown-up.
Do you have some favorite questions to ask your kids to get them to open up? Please share them in the comments below!