Women tend to have a bad reputation for being too emotional. Personally, this generalization doesn’t bother me because I believe we are build to be a little more emotional AKA nurturing. And there’s nothing wrong with that!
In fact, meeting our emotional needs is essential to our overall well-being. And should be a part of a healthy self-care routine. This will look different for every woman because we all have unique things that make us tick and when we deny those things we lose something super important – our joy.
The center of our emotional needs is relationships. We need to feel connected with others. And fake social media friendships are eroding this essential need. Telling our Instastory online isn’t the same as sitting across the table from your bestie at Starbucks.
We need to hear a voice on the other line who’s talking to us. Reading blogs and watching
inspirational videos on social media is fine, but we need people who are connected to us.
Get Connected with Friends
I don’t know about you, but finding the time to set up lunch dates or play dates with the kids is a real struggle. And so often our friends with kids are struggling in the same area, which becomes a recipe for isolation.
Isolation is a breeding ground for depression. You don’t have anyone who can pull you out of your funk. Know what I mean?
We need someone to tell us it’s going to be alright and this will pass. Or that what you’re going through isn’t crazy but totally normal! When all you listen to all day is your critical thoughts playing on auto-repeat it’s hard to feel strong emotionally.
Being a mom is hard work!
But hearing that it’s OK from another mom in the trenches is sometimes all you need. Once I started having children and working from home… life got lonely.
Over the years I looked up and realized I didn’t have many friendships at all. Life was going on around me and I just felt by myself.
If that’s you, reach out and talk to a friend. Even if it’s been a long time. Or, if you don’t have many or any friends, find some mom groups where you can get the kids out and meet some new moms. Don’t be afraid to step out there!
Get Connected with Your Spouse
Your marriage is also a major cornerstone in your life and that relationship needs to be nurtured too.
If you’re a single mom, don’t skip this section. If you desire to be married, apply this wisdom into
your dating relationships and future marriage.
Your spouse is someone you fell in love with and decided to start a life together. But over the years, the passion for one another can fade – if you’re not careful.
If you’re in a good place in your marriage, that’s fantastic. But you need to work to keep it there. That doesn’t mean that every couple needs a weekly date night. Though, some would argue with that.
You do need to make each other a priority. And the single most important priority in your marriage is communication. Talking to each other is essential to staying close and maintaining intimacy.
Related: 4 Habits to Guard Your Family From a Life of Complacency
Get Connected with Your Mind
Outside of nurturing and improving our relationships, we need to nurture and improve our minds. Many of us do that through the love of reading. For me, and so many others, reading is a personal experience. I love books!
I’ve always been a reader since I was a child, but somewhere along the line books became those things I collected but never actually read. I loved the idea of reading a particular book but after an exhausting day, I couldn’t get past one paragraph before I was snoring.
Now, books for me are near and dear to my heart and a very important part of my personal
development. I prefer to read non-fiction simply because I get more out of them for the time I spend reading them.
If you love fiction, and they bring you joy then go for it!
I understand though, books are not a love for everyone. Maybe you’ve never been much of a reader. But I’m going to assume you do like to read somewhat because you’re still with me. 🙂
Either way, reading is the age old way we as people grow and learn. We read to learn the struggles and victories of other people, and as we read – we grow. Reading allow us to be constantly exposed to new thoughts and ideas and keep our minds pliable instead of growing
stiff over time.
I want to urge you to make reading a regular and exciting part of your daily self-care routine!
Reading is an activity that’s enjoyable but also invests making you a better you.
If you feel like reading an actual book is difficult to ask on a regular basis, I encourage you to
look into listening to audio books. You can easily listen to a great book while doing other tasks like folding laundry or in the car while driving.
I would also strongly recommend giving yourself a daily reading goal just to keep you on track. Even reading just five pages a day will reap amazing results in your life!
Get Connected With Your Heart
Now that brings me to the last of the emotional needs – having some me-time. Having
me-time isn’t necessarily something you need to schedule every day, but it’s something you need to put on the schedule regularly.
And I’m not talking about the general “me-time” activities like getting your nails done. I believe getting your hair and nails done (if that’s something you choose to do) should be categorized as your regular grooming, not your me-time.
Me-time is something special and unique to you as a person.
It may be gardening in your family’s garden. But if you are simply gardening because it’s time to harvest your monthly veggies but you don’t have any real love for gardening – it’s NOT me-time.
Photography could be a me-time where you go out into nature and take breathtaking photos for a couple of hours uninterrupted.
Me-time is anything that simply brings you joy. It’s not your business or other money-making venture, it’s not something your family relies on, or an activity people are waiting on you to complete.
This is a no pressure activity!
Do What Brings You Joy!
Something purely for YOU and you alone. I bet if I asked most moms and women in general if they had an activity they love that they did regularly purely for themselves – most would answer a big, fat no.
And I’d add that most probably wouldn’t even know what that thing is of the top of their head! I know what you’re thinking – how can I do something all for me when I can’t even get a babysitter for things my family needs?
All I can do is urge you to realistically put yourself on your calendar. Remember, this
isn’t something that needs to happen every day at 6:00.
It’s a date you make with yourself at least on a monthly basis. And if you’re that one who doesn’t even know what you’d do, take time to go back in time. Go back to when you were in your 20’s, a teenager or even younger.
Think about the things you loved to do before all the demand on your time. Rediscover a lost part of yourself and bring it back into now. You never know how much it can add to your life!
What’s your idea of me-time? Share in the comments your favorite way to nurture your emotional needs.
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